Seize The Carp

People Kill Me

Ok I have one question for the people of Oklahoma. Are you really that stupid??????? I mean really. Do you really think that Hurricane Rita is going to hit Oklahoma??? Serioiusly. Sure we might get some remnants of rain, maybe even a little bit of wind, but do you really deem it nessecary to board up your windows? My god people. The worst that could happen is the warm air from Rita will mix with the cold air coming from Colorado and we get a tornado. You remember those dark spinning things that come in the spring time. That's worst case scenario. You're scared of something that's not relevant to OK, and don't even think about the true possibilities. Where is the common sense? Do we have any? Boarding your windows?!?!

So back to Katrina for a little bit. I now fully believe that any fault to be found in the wake of Katrina is ENTIRELY on the mayor of New Orleans and the Governer of Louisiana and the people of that beautiful crime-ridden place. Move people back into N.O. with another Cat 4/5 hurricane on the way? Wait and see what happens? Are you kidding me? New Orleans! Louisiana! You elected these idiots into office. Is the bourbon really that good as to effect who you put in office? Or was there a voodoo curse they were gonna cast on you if you didn't?

I have always maintained the theory of survival of the fittest. The strong, smart, macgyver/injun scouts will be those that do well. Hence, I claim libertarianism as my position on the political spectrum. People will govern themselves and the weak will die. Then reality kicks me in the ass. Boot To The Head!!!! If life were like this, I would be one of only about O say 7 people left on this planet. Ok maybe more than 7. I forgot about the geniuses in China. So the population of China, me, and 6 other people. J/K. But seriously. In reality, we've let our fellow man become blundering idiots and should really take responsibility for that. So if there is any one out there reading this and can't read it because of any hinderance I cause(d) to your learning process I'm sorry. I take responsiblity for your stupidity and will shoot you out back later to correct my mistake. See in this one paragraph you've seen the tree hugging liberal and the NRA loving conservative in me. An Elyse divided against itself will not stand.

There is a TV news station here in OKC that has this segment called The Rant. This bit is about postings/rantings on the

station's website

. The latest one I watched was about, I take that back I didn't watch it. I got disgusted after 15 seconds into the bit. It was about how people have literally fell ill because of the Sooners dismal season. Seriously, people have complained about nausea, headaches, and other flu-like symptoms. People are complaining about the direction the fearless leader (Bob Stoops) is taking the program. Coach Stoops, I have to ask you, did you not read your contract before you signed with OU? Did you not see Article I, Section I, Paragraph I of your contract? You should've; it's the first line. It says that, and I quote, "by signing with the University of Oklahoma as Head Coach I herein assume all responsibilty for the physical, emotional, and beer-drenched mental well being of all die-hard and fairweather fans in the state of Oklahoma and The United States of America." The people of Oklahoma had the legislature write that part up. It is so important to this state's way of life. I wasn't old enough to vote for its implementation.

O big news out of OKC. Mayor Mick Cornett and the NBA have struck a deal. The NBA is allowing Mick a chance in the Big League of Major Cities. Prior to yesterday, Mick has only played in the Little League of Minor Cities. No really the New Orleans Hornets Formerly Known As The Charlotte Hornets will now be known as the OKC Hornets. Who am I kidding? OKC isn't in the name. That's not part of the deal. So the Homeless Hornets are playing this season in OKC. This development has speculators speculating (cause that's what they do, speculate) that this could be the chance for OKC to have a major sports franchise become a permanent fixture here. Mick, I'm really glad you're an optimist, but when the season's over will you be a realist? Or is your term up by then? The people won't pay an extra 2 cents to rebuild the roads and highways. How are they going to afford tickets for a major NBA team? that's right. the liberals in Tulsa will push to get higher welfare checks and higher limits on access cards so the people can enjoy this new novelty. No I'm not talkin about the Hornets. OK is the home of fairweather fans. We're not going to support a team that went 16-64 last year. Sure we'll come to see Shaq, LaBron, Tim, and Allen, not whoever it is that plays for the Homeless Hornets. God I should be in marketing. That's catchy. So citizens of OKC, open up your hearts and your pocketbooks to help out these poor homeless. It's the only chance we have for permanancy.

In conclusion

All stupid people should be shot!

posted by Unknown @ 09:18